update.
Since finishing my class at the beginning of March, I have stepped out into the real world to brave finding a construction job. It's a tough road to tread all alone and I've had some moments where I have lost focus on my original ideas, but all in all, things are moving forward. The first week out there really rattled me, but I think it actually helped me clarify some things. First I got a lead about a small painting and construction company needing an office person. Not hands on, but moving in the right direction. I really just needed something to carry me through till I get into the electrician's union. The minute I walked in the had me fill out an application. While I was sitting there, the manager belittled the man next to me. my thoughts: is this guy seriously putting down one of his employees and micro-managing him in front of me? hmmm...requested wage? he couldn't pay me enough to work for him.... put down WAY too much... While I talked to him he looked over my past experience and looked for words that would not sound sexist - he told me I'd be better off being a designer than swinging a hammer. Phew. Thank god I priced myself out of that one.
Same week, next day. I worked a catering gig at work and missed the only application date in the month of March for the electrician's union. This means that I will probably not interview with the group interviewing in April. Missed it completely. Next likely interview time: Oct. Which all-in-all puts my time-line out almost a year. Then, I found out a friend got an unbelievably high score on his electrician's interview. In the 90s. Granted he's done construction-type work all his life. But it burned my britches. I was so jealous. Oh, and the clincher in my day/week was when a friend told me, that from her experience working with electricians, I was going to have a hard time getting a job in the field - I'm too girly for them. grrrrr....
I spent the rest of my week feeling defeated and considering other options. Then one of my classmates from the tradeswomen class snapped me out of it. She asked me, "you know what you want to do, right?" Yeah. "And you know what you have to do to get in right?" Yeah. "Then do it." OK. It's great having friends that are going through the same struggle so that we can give each other support. it's a built in fan club that understands the difficulties involved.
So, even though i don't know if i completely believe my friend claiming i'm too girly, it made me reconsider how people perceive me. so...I bought a man-fit. or man-suit. Basically an outfit to strip me of my femininity. It's humorous in that I have never felt girly and am kinda insecure about it. Never have I been told that I am too much like a girl. I went to the store, picked out a pair of men's khaki's and dress shirt from the sale rack and walked out a new women - strike that - "man."
I wore this outfit to an interview with a cable installer. And, of all things, I interviewed with two women. HA! so ironic. but all the same, I got a job offer the next day! I'm currently waiting for them to finish the background check. This was a positive move in the right direction.
I also made a decision to apply for the sheet metal workers union. they were great when we visited and i had a feeling that i needed to go back there. the visit reaffirmed how i felt about them. they are great. such helpful, nice people. I felt like i was actually wanted when i was there instead of feeling like an odd person for even applying. Interview was yesterday (quick turnaround too!). It went well, i think. It will be nice to have choices for once. although it's hard when you heart is in two places.
yesterday i also went back to the electrician's union and re-applied to their apprenticeship. (yesterday was the third tuesday of the month...i remembered this time...). This morning I got a phone call from the hall - they are squeezing me into the interviews in may!!!!!! I did a celebration dance in my apartment!!!!
I know it can be confusing for people to follow where I'm at in trying to make the best decision for my career (an life). I think my feelings come from a deep seeded place and come with a lot of history (as does everyone, i suppose) so explaining myself sometimes is hard. I have dreams of buildings tied deeply to the natural flow of the earth and community with a modern design touch and affordable price tag. I know I want to be both building these spaces with my hands and instructing others with a knowledge of the craft of building. The road i'm on is how I see myself getting there. I do not see my career as a straight path. Therefore, i think it can be hard to convey without sounding wishy-washy. That and that unlike a lot of people, I show everyone my process of figuring things out, rather than stating one thing as my final conclusion. Just so I'm clear as mud....there probably will never be a conclusion. I will always be refining myself and my future.... Thanks for making this journey with me. I love the support and hearing that people are enjoying my crazy life.
