gravy suckin' pigs.

Profile of today's car: Chevy Venture. 2002. Gold, just like in the picture. Got about 160,000 miles on it. As soon as you open the door it becomes evident that the owner is a smoker. A major smoker. The smell wafts over you like a brick wall. You think: does this person ever open the window when they smoke?!? There are ashes all over the place. On the seats, the floor, the dash. I'm sure if a rag was taken to the windshield a nicotine film would be evident. To add to the misery, the car is primarily used as dog transport. Upon looking (not rummaging) we found three trash bags filled with god knows what, three empty bottles of power steering fluid, a full bud light can, ashes and more ashes, and a lot of dog hair. When we came in this morning to start work on the car, we found a fairly big puddle of power steering fluid under the car. Did I mention that when stephanie drove the car in the power steering sounded like a dying cat? Check engine light is on. Brake pedal is soft. Customer complaint is a grinding noise when they hit the brakes. Boy oh boy. gonna be a good one.

Did i ever mention the car i got in when working at the major tire shop that had a barbie straddling the shifter? Well, it was awesome. People do awesome things in their cars.

This car is just straight nasty and neglected. Let me count the ways. 1. Bad wheel bearings. Give the tire a little wiggle, wiggle, wiggle. It's not supposed to do that. It could equal a wheel coming off the vehicle. seriously dangerous. 2. Are those metal spikes coming out of the side of that tire? Yep. Sure is. equals = potential for a blowout. 3. We took off the tires and went to remove the brake pads. Oh, the grinding you are having? Comes from the fact that you DON'T HAVE ANY BRAKE PADS LEFT!!!! We found one brake pad on the right front side where there should be two. In the missing one's place was a strip of metal that looking like a crushed aluminum can. It used to be the shim for the brake pad. The grinding? The piston on the caliper pushing against the rotor. (This is what is should look like. Notice TWO brake pads.) It's not built to stop the car that way.

I suppose that mechanics see stuff like that on a regular basis. The crazy thing is that a mechanic can't keep the car off the road. Our teacher said that the brake job we are doing on the car would probably cost the customer around $1500. (People get the luxury of getting the work done for free by students when they bring it in to Portland Community College.) Granted, mechanics can make a lot of money off brake work, but they can't make the customer buy the brake job. Brakes are a serious thing. It may seem like as assload of money, but imagine the consequences of not being able to stop a 1 ton automobile when headed for the crosswalk. Or with kids in the back. Or having a wheel come off while you are driving down the interstate, sending a 50lb wheel bouncing towards oncoming traffic. Not to lecture people, but come on. Have your car inspected every once in awhile. Hearing grinding? Bad, bad, bad. In the automotive world brake jobs are seen as gravy work because its necessary and once you get it down, you can do it faster each time. This is where gravy suckin' pigs comes from. Our teacher called stephanie and i that today. Sucking it down because we keep getting the easy jobs. Kinda cool. The scary part would be seeing something that bad and not having the customer buy the brake job. I'm sure my day will come.

Then there is my new-old car. My subaru wagon is stuck in a weird political limbo that I didn't know existed. The transmission class says it's not the axle that's bad but the wheel bearing (my class's domain). My teacher says it's not the wheel bearing but the CV joint (transmission's domain). So, this calls for a confrontation. Who is right? Who will fix it? Right now it is sitting on jack stands in the shop quietly waiting a decision. Who knew that even cars could be caught up in office politics.

Observation: The boys in class are moody. They have bad days and it's apparent to everyone around them. But the refuse to talk about it. Instead they sulk. There is absolutely no telling when a bad day is going to hit. No cycle.

I have a huge interview coming up in about a week. The day has finally come when I'm interviewing for my ranking for the electrician's apprenticeship. I've been stressing about it for awhile and am really hoping it goes well. Mostly about the image i portray. I know that most people look at my experience and schooling and think: no way is she going to do manual labor and get dirty. The way I dress is important, what I say is important, the evidence of the work i'm doing now is important. Sweat beads are forming on my forehead just thinking about it. I'll keep you posted on the outcome....

g'night.

School is in session.

It's that time. Time for new bookbags, dusting off my textbook (note the singular), and cracking open the toolbox. That's right - school time! Automotive school time! The summer has flown by and I am fully engaged in school again. In fact, we just finished our third week. It's been a rough three weeks. On top of getting back into the routine of rising out of bed before the sun peaks out behind the mountains in the east, I am working a more-than-full-time job as a manager of a cafe in Portland. The cafe went from 5 mph to 90 mph at the very same time as school started and I barely slept, ate or studied for the first two weeks. The cafe is attached to the biggest theater company in Portland and they kicked off their theater season the day after classes started. I went from having 3 employees to 12. EEK! I DO NOT like being the boss.

So....school has been rough because my brain capacity is limited. I think I may squeeze out a 'B' from Brakes I which will make me elated! I've been really upset with myself for the last week or so about my performance thus far. I got a 'C' on my first test and then a 'D' on one of my homeworks. I got freaked out enough to talk to the teacher who assured me that I'm doing ok and he told me, considering how much I have on my plate, I'm doing great. Phew.

We've been working on a brakes inspection this week and I get really frustrated being one of the slowest students in the class. At least that's the perception of myself. In reality, we are barely behind most other students. Considering I didn't even know the names of most of the brake components until two weeks ago, that is pretty gosh darn good.

By "we" I am referring to me and my partner in crime, Stephanie. She kicks ass and I really don't know how I would do all the school work without her. We even got together this week and did our homework together. Just like college the first time around. Except she has a curfew. :) It was really good to see her back in class. Most of the my old classmates came back and we even picked up some new students. For the most part they all seem to be decent people.

Also new developments, I am selling my beautiful '06 Jetta TDI (diesel) soon. I bought a car from a good friend of mine for $1200 and am on the road to no car payments. I'm going to be extremely sad to let it go. I highly anticipate that the Jetta will sell for a good chunk of change since it's a diesel and Portlanders are high on the bio-diesel craze. My housemate actually drives an older model of the exact same car and dons the recognizable "BIO_DIESEL" sticker. There are probably between 5-10 diesels in a 2 block radius from my house. Crazy.

My new-old car is a Subaru wagon. It's been well taken care of, but like a lot of older cars needs a little bit of attention. Luckily I attend automotive school and can have it fixed for the cost of the parts. Gettin' a new front axle this week and a look-over from the HVAC class next week. Gonna be a dream when I'm done with her. Including climbing underneath and putting on a new muffler. I am excited to have a car that I can work on.

That's about it for now. I did write a few memorable lines down in my class notes in the last couple weeks. It's still a shock how ridiculous the naming of the parts and procedures is. Rod. Shaft. Just call it the drive penis why don't you?! My lab partner keeps me young and constantly on guard for new ridiculous statements. Last weeks: "Just take your hammer and POUND IT OUT FROM BEHIND (my emphasis added)." giggle. giggle.

Then the newest lingo on the street: How's the angle of your dangle? Use instead of "How's it going?" or "How's it hanging?"

Go forth and spread the good news of the little automotive girl that could.